Choose to be positive

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OK, considering the vast majority of my posts are positive I can’t beat myself up too much about last night’s meltdown.  You all know I love Ideal Protein.  You all know I’ve lost 100+ pounds since May 30th, 2012.  You all know.  

It’s also good to be transparent with my struggles, because I don’t want anyone to think, not for a moment, that this has been easy.  Nor do I want anyone to think that just because I’ve lost most of the weight I want to lose that the struggle is over.  This will be a lifelong struggle for me, and that’s just the truth.

With any struggle there will be easier times and harder times.  At this juncture it’s been a bit more difficult, for many reasons.  And going through sugar/carb withdrawal 2 weeks in a row is nothing I would recommend.  Those closest to me, emotionally and by proximity, have bared the brunt of the emotional roller coaster and I’m really sorry about that.  I’m human.  I continue to try to improve, but I am human.

That said I’m going to view food as medicine for now, and nothing more.  I have to look at everything I can’t eat right now as poison, and maybe that will help.  I don’t know.

All I can do is try.

I really miss running because it was such a great stress relief and now it’s like I have nothing for stress relief.  

191.2 this morning.  If I could just never see the 190’s again I will be a very happy girl.  And the only one who can ensure I never see them again is the woman writing this blog.

So here I go.  Again.

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